​PETRO

ETERNUM

WASHINGTON

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FOSSIL FUELS... FOREVER

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SERVICES

Construction Plans

Native Habitat Renovation: Make it Better.

We recognize the "environmental" value of estuaries and tideflats, but the fact is: business is business. So let's be real. The environment is of little value if it isn't fully taken advantage of for profit, for consumption and for family-wage jobs... right?

Architectural Modelling

Ecologically Sound Mass Distribution

​The ports of Washington state are bursting at the seams with our products, yet we still and always will need to expand, so we came up with a solution: let's take advantage of unused public spaces everywhere, and not just in the ports.

Construction Site

Environmental Narrative & Capital Investment ... together!

Efficient and profitable fuel distribution doesn't come easy. Nevertheless, we need to make gas and oil good to the last drop. And by putting mass storage of our fossil fuel products in WA public parks, commercial zones and private property  - we all win!

PRODUCTS

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TACTICAL PEW POD TANK

Petro Eternum WA's cleverly designed TACTICAL PEW POD TANK is perfect size for neighborhood parks, empty lots and even your own backyard! At 50,000 gallons its tiny footprint of a mere 24' in diameter means plenty of gas or oil that provides you, your family and friends with immediate fossil fuel satisfaction, with no nagging worries about running low. Check out the blue print for this amazing design HERE.

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OPERATIONAL PEW POD TANK

The OPERATIONAL PEW POD TANK comes in at a healthy 1 million gallons. While these tanks are probably too big for your backyard, they are perfect to fill in the wasted space of most neighborhood parks, helping provide gas and oil to those most urgently in need... you and all of your neighbors, as well as cities thousands of miles away! Keep on truckin'!

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STRATEGIC PEW POD TANK

The monumental 8 million gallon STRATEGIC PEW POD TANK is ideal for independent institutions and corporations looking to "get off the grid" and supply themselves with the life-blood of modern life, with a bravado and nuanced esthetic that will cause competitors and compatriots alike to stand in awe, with fear and trembling, at the immense power a  STRATEGIC PEW POD TANK owner possesses. 

 
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SAFETY

We have done extensive studies showing that if any of our meticulously designed PEW POD TANKS leaks NOT A DROP could possibly go beyond the ultra-secure Porta-Fence line of that facility... guaranteed! Anybody who questions these studies is a radical fringe kook just looking to stir up trouble. TRUE!

DON'T BE A NIMBY! Tell your friends and family you support PEW, and they should, too!

 

Climate

Emergency?

HOAX!

Projects Planned?

Infinite

Expansion!

Catastrophic

Accidents?

Can't Happen!

​Campaigns

Financed?

Nearly All!

 

PROJECTS

PEW is especially proud to be working with the City of Tacoma, which has agreed to spend millions of taxpayer dollars opening up additional fire stations, providing emergency training, and strengthening roads for extended truck use of our tanks. It’s thanks to Tacoma for not banning fossil fuel expansion via repressive interim regulations that we’re able to do this. Gas and oil industries have been expanding here for decades! Why stop now?  Viva Tacoma!

CLIENTS

 

CONTACT

Inquiries

For any inquiries, questions or commendations, please fill out the following form. Don't expect a reply unless you got cash.

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Head Office

22 Catch St.

Hamilton, Bermuda

Employment

Sorry, there are no local jobs available with Petro Eternum Washington, LLC. All our services are performed by carefully trained workers from elsewhere, who are more than happy to work for less than the locals to poison the local habitat.

Don't like what PEW is up to?

Then you probably want to check THIS out to help put a halt on expanding fossil fuel industries in Tacoma.